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Monday 6 July 2015

Tour Synopsis - by the Unknown Knight

Mikey Armstrong I know you been waiting for this!

Much in jest - a synopsis by the Unknown Knight!

As the tour finally cultimates it's time to recollect on the enjoyable ten days. 

Despite living only two minutes from the airport Burkey still managed to arrive late wearing a matching Armani tracksuit whilst sporting a Lucozade bottle in one hand and a scratch card in the other. The players were distracted from checking in as we spotted a stunning middle aged women of whom was mother to one of our players - ask your son if you're the lucky lady in question! For the articles sake, this women will be named 'Lady A'. This was to ignite much of the tour banter! After emotional goodbyes were said, we as elite level athletes decided it to be best to consume a complete English breakfast. 

This amazing diet continued on touchdown in America as Joe Baythorpe (soon to be Gait Cup all star) and Jack Burke adapted to American life as they headed straight towards Chipotle. Much was purchased from Lacrosse Unlimited as Ben Page-Laycock took it upon himself to put a smile on the store owners face and subsequently a condescending frown on his parents face and he determined that half the store was an essential purchase.  

We finally arrived at the Gait Cup. The atmosphere was upbeat, the banter was flowing, and the players attempted a recreation of 'Lord of the Flies' when the heavily anticipated playing kit arrived. Pizza was ordered, the first of many, and we were in awe of the facilities available at a Divison III university. We were relishing the opportunity to play elite American opposition.

Our initial seeding was to be played against Quiet Storm and we started tentative conceding early goals as nerves got the better of us. However, we faught back playing our best lacrosse and came out dominant. Jack Burke put in a performance reminiscent of his David Beesley cup finals not to forget a stellar job on the face off by none other than Chas Syme. Chas' work was to become a key asset to our team throughout the tour. We were ecstatic to gain our first victory across the pond and as tradition posed for a picture with the opposing team however with a special 2015 Knights twist replacing the word "cheese" with the phrase "Lady A is relatively good looking".

That Guy, Zac Guy made his appearance on the second day accompanied by Division I All American athlete (and boyfriend) Tyler Knarr. We played high intensity, solid, fast paced lacrosse and ended the day with a 3-1 record as we became the "antidote to their venom".

Our winning ways continued into the next day as we won two morning games and proceeded into the playoffs where we met highly rated and soon to be Gait Cup winners Alcatraz Outlaws. Unfourtunatley we unable to win this game and thus our tournament came to an end. When leaving we noticed that our arch nemesis' Venom were playing the game after us... 

Scott took a prominent role in mocking the venom goalkeeper as he scooped the ball out of his goal after each shot by Luke. Coach then named the goalie after a useful cooking utensil, "SIVVOOO, SIVVOOO, SIVVOOO" was the cry. The promising sixteen year old goalie decided to hang up his gloves after this humiliating experience. 

After two days of what Hal does best, eating and sleeping, at King of Prussia we departed for the Bison Brawl at Bucknell University. This was where we were to flourish. 

Using Alan Stones as a prime example of lacrosse excellence we seeded third approaching the playoffs. It was here, without breakfast, we played our best lacrosse reaching the final. 

Scott was emotional at this period of time as winning the Bison Brawl had been the goal set prior to the tour. Unable to speak, we took the team talk ourselves and got off to an early lead. We went into half time leading 4-2. Both coaches told us it was ours for the taking and all we had to do was close the game out. However, after the half we nearly did 'a Brooklands' and the game got to 5-5. It was here a timeout was called where Scott and Zac were the difference maker instructing us how to close out the game. We followed this advice and came out victorious! The tears came streaming down Scott's face as final whistle blew! It was an emotional moment for all those involved.

This high continued as Spandau Ballet 'Gold' was murdered by the squad. This remained through all six hours of the coach journey to the Brine National. 

We were all aboard the 'soul taxi' to the event, apart from Scott who arrived one hour later... We were treated like royalty and utilised our accents to gain exclusive access to all areas. We played two difficult games against top level opposition losing the first to Connecticut and shocking ourselves and those around us with a draw to 2014 winners and well known lacrosse hotbed Long Island. This demonstrated just how far we'd come from Wilmslow 2013. 

This trip would not have been possible without enormous contributions from: 
Lynne Burnham - Everybody's second mother, organising many events and her relentless sales of raffle tickets and collection of training money. She was often the one motivating us for training when even Scott wasn't in a fit state to do so.

Chris Peacock - My Junior made an appearance every single Sunday and we were gutted he was unable to travel with us on the coaching team.
Mike Armstrong - Though busy with work he still made consistent appearances at training and too was unable to travel as a coach due to national squad commitments. 
Scott Dagnanleach and Mike Connor - Even though they're both pursuing their education across the pond, they still made tremendous contributions to training when back home. 
Jak Vav - Unable to spell his last name, in the trainings he did attend he was a massive help to the defence and progressed our play. He too was unable to join us coaching due to national squad commitments.
Tyler Knarr - Only with us for one day, he was essential to Chas' excellent showing on tour.
Zac Guy - The man, the myth, the legend. Some may label him 'the coolest man to walk the earth' but as it turns out, he's actually very good at coaching and playing lacrosse. Often shielding the referees from Scott's wrath, he's immense lacrosse I.Q was helpful in many situations. 
The parents - Personal taxi service and bank, avid supporters, and merchants in Facebook embarrassment "we gave your boys a hell of a beating" and "us mums love it".
Scott Weddell - This would all of been impossible without his work. Scott provides the only real exposure to the American game and has worked so hard over the previous five years to build up the programme and all those involved are so grateful for his work. Though sometimes we were "mugging him off" we all have the upmost respect for him and everything he's done. Our success was a testiment to his work. 

Here's to the most successful Knights team to date: 
Hal "SIVVOOO" Dwobeng
Jack "Beesley" Burke
Matt "I'm not keen I just know what I'm doing" Tatton 
Adam "Are you even trying to run?" Fox
Pat "What does Burnage mean?" Sugden 
Dan "Timperley first team" Walker
Sam "Tapper, tickler, clutch knockdown King, chopper" Harris
Jack "My goal was a worldie" Peacock
Chas "Arm breaker" Syme
Cam "Leg breaker" Syme
Matt "Hit the hay" Smith 
TJ "I love Matt Smith" Burgess
Elliot "Jelly" Leonard
Sam "Perm" Wilks
Joe "Underage" Cheetham
Cian "Old" Conway
Jake "I punch harder with my right" Parker
Dan "Are you number 69?" Aspin
James "That's a big internet bill" Pomfrett 
Will "Gatorade out the pram" Cornwell
Billy "Bilbo" Kershaw
Oil "Mr lacrosse I.Q" Loveland
Joe "All star" Baythorpe
Ben "Fish out the pond" Page-Laycock

Once a Knight, always a Knight #ET2

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